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Woman Faces 20 Years of Felony Charges, Criminal Record for Overdue Video Rental

Elias Marat

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A Texas woman recently learned that she had a 21-year-old outstanding warrant for her arrest, a felony embezzlement charge, and had likely been passed up for jobs over two decades – all due to a Sabrina the Teenage Witch video tape.

While video rental stores have been largely rendered extinct by changing technology and the rise of streaming services, 52-year-old, Caron McBride has long been haunted by the ghost of entertainment’s past.

The 52-year-old recently learned that she had run afoul of the law in neighboring Oklahoma when she tried to get her name changed on her drivers’ license following her marriage.

She then learned of the charges against her for renting the tape, which she has no recollection of ever watching.

Either way, her name was used to rent the VHS tape at Movie Palace in Norman, Oklahoma, on Valentine’s Day in 1999.

Following the duration of the 10-day rental period, the tape wasn’t returned – and was referred to law enforcement.

Prosecutors argued that McBride had “wilfully, unlawfully and feloniously embezzled” the tape, which was valued at a stunning $58.59.

And while the story faded into the annals of shuttered video rental venues in 2008, her criminal record continued to persist.

Upon learning of her felony embezzlement charge, she called the Cleveland County District Attorney’s office in Oklahoma and learned about the charge “over the VHS tape.”

“I had to make her repeat it because I thought, this is insane,” she said. “This girl is kidding me, right? She wasn’t kidding.”

“I thought I was going to have a heart attack,” she told KOKH.

She’s pretty sure that the “felony embezzlement” charges likely narrowed her job prospects and led to her rejection by prospective employers in at least five cases over the past 20-plus years.

“It’s a serious issue. It’s caused me and my family a lot of heartache financially because of the positions I’ve lost because of those two words. Something’s got to give,” she told KFOR.

On April 21, prosecutors finally dropped the charges citing the “best interest of justice,” but McBride must still have her record expunged.

McBride believes that the man she lived with at the time may have rented the video for his two young daughters.

“I’m thinking he went and got it and didn’t take it back or something,” she said. “I have never watched that show in my entire life — just not my cup of tea.”

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Lunar New Deal: GOP Lawmaker Suggests Altering Moon & Earth’s Orbit to Stop Climate Change

Elias Marat

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Texas Republican Congressman Louise Gohmert raised the eyebrows of his Congressional colleagues on Tuesday after seemingly suggesting that climate change could be combatted by changing the orbit of the moon, or even altering “Earth’s orbit around the sun.”

Gohmert, who has been decried as the “dumbest member of Congress” for his past absurdly anti-scientific comments regarding the ongoing pandemic and a number of other issues, has been a vocal opponent of progressive legislators’ attempts to put a “Green New Deal” on the government’s agenda.

However, his apparent suggestion of a “Lunar New Deal” to mitigate global warming could take the cake as his most hare-brained idea yet.

The comments came during a House Natural Resources Committee hearing on four pending bills while questioning Jennifer Eberlien of the Department of Agriculture’s Forest Service, reports NBC.

“I understand, from what’s been testified to the Forest Service and the B.L.M. [Bureau of Land Management], you want very much to work on the issue of climate change,” the Texas congressman began.

“I was informed by the immediate past director of NASA that they’ve found that the moon’s orbit is changing slightly and so is the Earth’s orbit around the sun,” he continued.

“We know there’s been significant solar flare activity,” Gohmert said. “And so, is there anything that the National Forest Service or B.L.M. can do to change the course of the moon’s orbit or the Earth’s orbit around the sun?”

“Obviously that would have profound effects on our climate,” the lawmaker added.

Responding, Eberlein said with a smile: “I would have to follow up with on you on that one, Mr. Gohmert.” 

“If you figure out there’s a way in the forest service you could make that change, I’d like to know,” Gohmert responded, without any trace of irony.

Longtime critics of the conservative legislator were besides themselves with bewilderment and mockery over the out-of-this-world suggestion.

On the opposite side of the aisle California Democratic Congressman Ted Lieu suggested that perhaps Marvel Comics superheroine Captain Marvel was up to the task.

“She can alter planetary orbits with her superpowers. I’m going to work on a bipartisan resolution asking for her help,” Lieu wrote on Twitter.

According to NASA, the Earth’s climate has changed throughout history for various reasons, including small variations in the planet’s orbit.

However, the agency’s website notes that this doesn’t discount the fact that anthropogenic or human-caused activities are the culprit of the current warming.

“The current warming trend is of particular significance because most of it is extremely likely (greater than 95 percent probability) to be the result of human activity since the mid-20th century and proceeding at a rate that is unprecedented over millennia,” the site says.

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Man Finds Out His Grandparents’ Home Once Belonged To Girlfriend Of Serial Killer Ted Bundy

Elias Marat

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A user of Reddit has seemingly Adiscovered that his grandparents live in the same home where infamous serial killer Ted Bundy once lived.

In a post to the social platform, a photo of the user’s grandparents’ fireplace can be seen along with a picture displayed on a phone that shows a couple appearing to be posing in the same living room. The post reads: “Ted Bundy dated someone who used to live in my grandparents’ house.”

The well-known photo shows Ted Bundy embracing Elizabeth Kloepfer, who dated Bundy during his brutal killing spree that claimed about 30 lives between 1974 and 1978.

Klopfer later reported her boyfriend to the police after recognizing his face in a composite sketch. However, the police failed to apprehend him at the time due to the large influx of tips regarding possible suspects of the serial murders.

She later reported Bundy again after realizing that women were disappearing near Salt Lake City, Utah – not far from where the couple lived, and quite possibly where the home on Reddit is located.

However, this attempt also failed after a witness couldn’t identify the serial murderer in a line-up.

Bundy later allegedly scorched the head of one of his victims in the fireplace presumably pictured in the Reddit post before ditching the body in a mountain.

Bundy told then-detective Robert Keppel: “Of all the things I did to [Kloepfer], this is probably the one she is least likely to forgive me for. Poor Liz.”

Bundy was given the death penalty for his crimes and was finally executed on Jan. 24, 1989.

Redditors were convinced that the fireplace shown in the post was the same one that belonged to Kloepfer.

“That’s not ‘someone,’” one user wrote. “That’s THE one. He dated Liz for a majority of his active years.”

Another user added: “Right. And wasn’t he with Liz when he said he’d burned some body parts of a victim in a fireplace? Could this be THE fireplace?”

The original poster eventually returned to the thread to explain that they learned that the home did, indeed, once return to Kloepfer.

“The house was built for a doctor and his family who turned out to be Liz,” the poster wrote. “Liz dated Teddy for a good part of his active years and they broke up when he got arrested and had to leave the state I believe.”

“My family bought the house a few years ago with zero relation to ‘ol Teddy,” they added. “Just crazy coincidence!”

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New York Times Publishes, Then Pulls, Strange Article About ‘Fields of Watermelons on Mars’

Elias Marat

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The New York Times has long been known as the “Grey Lady of Journalism,” reflecting the newspaper’s institutional identity as a credible and respectable source of daily news.

However, on Tuesday an extremely bizarre claim graced the pages of the “paper of record”: that fields of watermelons had been discovered on Mars, a discovery made by police.

The story, which appeared as a stub, was pulled within an hour of publication. However, an archived snapshot of the “scoop” still remains.

“Authorities say rise of fruit aliens is to blame for glut of outer space watermelons,” read the story, according to a cached copy from Google News. “The FBI declined to comment on reports of watermelons raining down, but confirmed that kiwis have been intercepted.”

“This story is terribly boring,” it read.

The article has been replaced with a message noting that the story had been “published in error.”

The fact that the publication was likely the result of either a prank or human error is clear based on the byline, which attributes the story to a “Joe Schmoe.”

According to Futurism, the newspaper hasn’t yet addressed the strange incident. However, the website speculates that it may well have been an erroneous publication of a some test of the company’s backend content management system.

It goes without saying that while NASA missions and a Chinese rover are scouring Mars for native life, no large melons or kiwis have been discovered on the Red Planet.

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